Dear Self,
I wonder how it is possible we still surviving this journey. It was like it was just yesterday, June 23, 1986, I Bruce Lee my way out of my mother's womb. A little boy born into a world with so much strife. Remembering the good times and bad times throughout our life. From those crazy days moms worked hard alone to raise a young black boy (I love you Ma'), riding in the limo with my gangstress Grandmother (she always kept it Grade-A) and the pots of coke, feds taking away a little boy's father and uncles (must visit Uncle Kenny and Chris). My family been through too much, self, but still how we surpass it; it must be the love and the hearts we have to never quit.
I was listening to Scarface in his song Never, and his last few lines struck me with deligh and had me thinking. "I'll never talk a nigga down, do your thing. Never hate a dude for trying, that's insane. Get your motherfucking money, that's the thing dawg. Too many homies dying young."
Self, I was at a lost of words for how I wanted to present my words to my peers about respect and jealousy. Recently, I have been seeing a lot of disrespect and jealousy going on within our generation that has left a bad taste on my soul. It just does not make any sense to me why another could knock another for staying grounded or even just shining. Whatever, happened to congradulating that person for their accomplishments. Better yet, whatever happened to getting down that person and learning also how to shine. Jealousy, I see is the number one killer amongst our people. Why they mad I live in my own world and play by own rules? I got to make me happy and be true to my essence, Self. I look into the mirror and I see the pain and happiness flowing through my eyes.
Growing up pro-black, proper and trapped between two worlds of the hood and being in the burbs. Self, there is just so much I want to express, but I cannot find all of the words. Just know, we battled so much and I owe to you, Self. You taught me how to believe in me and always keep that motivational drive, for it'll be your inspiring drive called ambition.
Self, I still find it hard forgiving myself of all the dirt I have done. From hearts I have broken and the drugs I have pushed to my peers just to pay a college tution. This mission that is destined to me will I achieve or will fail, and end up another motherfucka that could have been. These nightmares I have, have me restless in the late night.
Self, all I ever want to do is give my city hope and pride, So many, talk shit about Milwaukee, but only if they knew the history and gave us our chance, they will see Creme City has a heart and not to be fucked with. I change so much in my life, Self, to give those little kids living in boarded houses and within the systems with no family something to look up to, and to inform them that they are not alone and they will shine.
There is much I could write on about, Self, but I rather let time and my actions tell my stories and teaching. I just want to thank you, Self, for your stories and teachings has taught me so much. Thank you for the people you have put in my direction and the people you have directed me to. Those words from Brother Munir still stick to my ribs, "Your life will only be measured by how much you measure it. If you for put a limit on it that is as far it will go, but if you make it unlimited you will go so far then you could ever believe. Salaam little Brother Abdul-Rauf." Most definitely, I thank you, Self, for still filling me.
Sincerly,
Dante
P.S.
My life is eternity because my mind is on a whole another level of living.
Because I can send your mind through a circus/ And it'll be a bonus if I cause you to burst/ You're a goddess/So gorgeous/ I like your moves, so gracious/ I might have to praise Jesus/ I make a promise/ To keep only the realness/ No need to be nervous/ Notice, what I speak is painless/ For you, I give full service/ It's about us - Tonight will be X-Mas/ My words will lift you from the surface/ A pull that'll have you weightless/ Feel the wholeness/ Taste the sweetness/ Nothing too complex/ Just mind sex
Because I can send your mind through a circus/ And it'll be a bonus if I cause you to burst/ You're a goddess/So gorgeous/ I like your moves, so gracious/ I might have to praise Jesus/ I make a promise/ To keep only the realness/ No need to be nervous/ Notice, what I speak is painless/ For you, I give full service/ It's about us - Tonight will be X-Mas/ My words will lift you from the surface/ A pull that'll have you weightless/ Feel the wholeness/ Taste the sweetness/ Nothing too complex/ Just mind sex
